Songbook: How Would You Like To Be Me?

(Some Kiwi verses to the tune of Threshing Machine)

I once went to visit my great uncle Jim
His wife had just thrown a tomato at him
"Tomatoes don't hurt," said I with a grin
He said, "This one did, it was inside a tin."

Tra-la-la, tra-la-lee
Oh how would you, how would you
Like to be me

I once went to vist my girlfriend Miss Brown
She was having a bath and she couldn't come down
She said, "I'll just slip on something and be down in a tick"
She slipped on the soap and she sure came down quick


I met an old man at a funeral one day
His hair it was long and his beard it was grey
"I'm close on a hundred," he said with a moan
I said, "You'd be wasting your time to go home."


I once met a beggar along the main street
He'd no clothes to his back and no shoes to his feet
I felt sorry for him and the-en and there
Went into the fruit shop and brought him a pear


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